|
|
|
From the Desk of Bill Cirone...
February 18, 2000
Teaching Self-Confidence
Self-confidence is a trait that enables young people to succeed in school. Self-confident students are brave enough to raise their hands and risk providing an incorrect answer. They are brave enough to write essays that reveal their reasoning skills. They take academic risks and stretch their potential.
But self-confidence can be difficult to acquire and very difficult to teach. Parents can help nurture those skills and reap the rewards that result.
For example, children can be taught to question some conventional wisdom. There will always be those who say that something can’t be done. Help children identify the difference between those who have real wisdom and those who are just naysayers.
Emphasize that practical knowledge is just as important as learned knowledge, because knowledge lies at the heart of self-confidence. If students know how to do something, they will be more confident in their abilities.
Hearing your stories builds self-confidence as well, especially with the stories that demonstrate that you experienced the same types of issues your children face. The key is to show in a colorful way how you handled those situations. The message is, “If I survived, you can, too.” Here’s an important footnote: Make sure your stories illustrate a specific point and aren’t told over and over again.
Remember that persistence leads to success. One of the most difficult things for young people to learn is that it’s fine to fail, and that when they do, they can get back up and try again. Children need to see that it’s acceptable to stand up for what they believe, even when they’re unsuccessful or their stance is unpopular.
Find out what your child is good at, and encourage it. Nothing breeds self-confidence better than success. In school, children are required to take every subject, even those that are not their strengths. Those courses can cause frustration, especially when school struggles eat away at confidence or courage.
So be sure to focus your encouragement on the things your children do well, and don’t dwell on the areas where they might fall short. Show them that you believe they are successful. Knowing that YOU have confidence in them will help strengthen their own self-confidence.
© Santa Barbara County Education Office
<.shtml>